A Blast From the Past at Last

I was rooting through a cupboard trying to find a little USB hub (to no avail, might I add) and discovered an old notepad. I had originally used it, very briefly, to take notes at college a few years ago but then it turned into a log book for workouts. It got all full up and got put away, the workouts long forgotten, the penis doodles never to be seen again. Or so it thought...

Dun dun duuuuuuuun! (Image Source)

There was one occasion I can recall where I had the notepad with me at college. As Richmond is the last stop on the District line and also the location of my college, trains would often wait at the station until it was their scheduled time to leave. This particular day I had no form of passing the time other than the notepad and decided to whip it out and write something. It ended up being a weird poem based around the 'W' sound, using lots of words that begin with the letter W or it's sound. For some reason I cannot describe, explain or even begin to understand I have decided to transcribe it here. It has been extremely imaginatively titled 'W', that's just who I am.

W

I wish I was a washer with a wall on which to wish,
And I wish I had a waiter, waiting while I watered fish,
With a willow waving to the West and wailing in the wind,
I would wish and wash and wave and wail and whack a Will O' Wisp,
With a wizard waving wands and a willing whale or two,
I would wear one hundred worms with a witch that I would woo,
We will walk along the water while the women stop and stare,
Why do their eyes wander? Why they wuv my wavy hair!
I will whisper to a waiter when the wizard wants a meal,
And I'll whack down the willow when I want to make a wheel,
And the whale, with his wondrous wit, will have a bright idea,
"Why don't I wear the wheel and you can ride with me up here!?",
Well I wouldn't want to hurt his feelings, why don't I accept?
What ever would go wrong with a whale as my pet?
So the wizard, waiter, witch and willow, at least whatever's left,
Will climb up right away and wheel off into the wet,
"What's this?" I wailed through water, "We've left the Will O' Wisp!",
We turned and watched the water, the whale wading through the mist,
When suddenly we heard a whimper whipping through the dark,
"Woah!" I cried out to the whale and laughed a whimsical laugh,
Wandering through the wide, wet water, the Wisp was what I saw,
So I swam away, towards poor Wisp as he whimpered, pawed and clawed,
"Little Wisp! I've found you! Won't you come aboard with me?",
"Why certainly" he wailed as we climbed out of the sea,
"Whatever were you thinking when you didn't climb the whale?",
"Well I wanted to, I really did, but he hit me with his tail!",
Well it's lucky I'm a washer as the Wisp was wet and dirty,
"Not now!" I wailed at the witch, as she was getting flirty!
I washed the Wisp and watched the water and hollered to the whale,
"Whale, we should spin around. Switch your head and tail",
We went back to the beach, and I waved to my new friends,
And I went back home and went to bed and wished it wouldn't end,
When I awoke I felt so sad, but when I opened my hand,
I found a whale's whisper and a wad of cold, wet sand,
I knew my friends were happy with the wish that I had made,
The wizard, witch, whale, waiter and Wisp had really made my day.

A little late but I used the word, happy?! (Image Source)

So there it is, a poor Seuss-esque mess of W. If I could art, I would draw a scene from this though, make it really moody and awesome. Like use pastels and rounded edges, have a wheeled whale swimming the tides with a witch and wizard on his back and a dude swimming towards a glowing Wisp, pink and orange sky, slightly cartoony. Damn I wish I could art...

One of these things if you were confused (Image Source)